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There's a fine line.
She’s happier than ever, but I almost wish the lie didn’t work so well.
Colleague told me he was going out to lunch today. He came back with a store-bought sandwich an hour later
How to promote unfailing loyalty from your employees
After seeing Trump say that he did not fire James Comey because of the Russia investigation on Twitter this morning
Can't pay your bills and enjoy disrespectng others do ya?
Starbucks racial-bias training in a nutshell
So you have any hand sanitizer?
Some of my coworkers really need to learn this...
Some of us don't enjoy being criminals.
Cops being bros
Took me 50 years but finally think I'm adulting...
Good hardworking bosses can be hard to find
Attempted peroxide
She isn’t abusive or anything, she’s just unbearable
Can anyone relate?
My friend is an elementary school teacher. She texted me this question last night.
Sorry but my life is worth 2 of yours.
Walmart just emailed our promo codes to customers to save $10 off $35. Here’s me doing something that the cheapskates at Walmart will fire me for.
triple, venti, soy, heavy cream, fat free, extra, extra, at 120 degrees, etc.
Let’s bring back a timeless classic.
How I feel living in Canada right now
Shoot the messenger but snobs and rednecks should be able to govern their states, cities and counties their way.
Today I found out we have motion sensor lights
It was worth joining
Worth it
If only everyone had 20/40 vision
Just lick 'em bro
Guess I'll be fapping to a better looking version of my ex wife after the movie.
Does it say April or August? What year is that? Does it smell OK?
But my cigarette count down from 20 to 4 tho..
As a small business owner, I think I'm a great boss
This is worse than just firing you on the spot!
FTFY, Kermit. Or maybe i'm just antisocial? 4403 rollover minutes and counting.
You never know...
If you lease a vehicle, get gap insurance
Got into an argument with my Italian uncle about sauce vs gravy
Bad kid joke.
883 Ambybutt Relevant story time. Last year I went to the mall, this mall has two different parking levels that are accessed by the same elevator/stairwell and look practically identical. I parked my car on p2 (2nd level). So I go do my shopping, grab some groceries and a video game. I take the stairs down this time and get off on P1 without noticing it. Good, I didn't forget where I parked my car. But wait, where are my bumper magnets? Where's my dash cam? Where did all my change in the center console go? FUCK IVE BEEN ROBBED. How did they get into my car? Did I forget to lock it? I swear I heard the horn honk when I tapped the lock button on my fob. So I run to the security office and tell them what happened, groceries in tow. I get there and they ask me to lead them back to my car. So I do, except this time I actually go to p2. My car is there, same spot but all my things are in it and the door is locked properly. I can't explain to these people what the hell is going on. I swear up and down all my shit was gone. The security guard tells me to come with him, we walk up the stairwell and parked in the same spot directly above my car is an identical one, even the same trim package. I am an idiot.
2359 fuber I grabbed my snowboarding bag off the baggage claim in Denver. Turns out a "friendly" guy had the exact same bag and angrily pushed me out of the way. "That's my girlfriends bag bro!". I went to grab the ticket to prove it was mine and turned out he was right.
1618 IronRoughneck We studied a case in criminal law a while back about the defense of mistake. The case the book used to illustrate the doctrine, was awesome: A little old lady walks out of the grocery store. She sees 4 men sitting in her car. In response, she pulls her gun out of her purse and screams at the men to get out of the car. The men exit the car and run away. The little old lady hops in the front seat and tries to start her car... the key doesn't work. It's only then that the little old lady realizes her car is the next aisle over. The cars are identical. Realizing her mistake, the little old lady goes to the police station to explain what happened. The officer she speaks to bursts into laughter and points to 4 men on the other side of the room, visibly shaken from being carjacked by a little old lady. Edit: I'll post the case/story when I get home. I think it was from a newpaper and used in the casebook as a hypothetical to apply the mistake defense. Edit 2: Here it is from my textbook. [Page 585 of Dressler 7th]( . The section was on justification as a defense, not mistake. Last Edit: [According to Snopes, this is probably a myth. Sorry. ](
198 buttery_shame_cave my first car was a '73 mustang. i drove down out to oakland once. parked in a lot, went and did what i was in town for, and when i got back walked to what i thought was my car - paint and top matched, model and year matched... unlocked the door, got in, key wouldn't turn the ignition. wtf? i'd changed my ignition out, so it was a separate key. it hadn't ever been sticky but first time for everything... a couple tries and i realize... this isn't my car. the interior is off... doesn't match. i get up, and a row over, another guy does the same thing out of my car. our door keys matched but ignition didn't. model, color, exterior was perfectly matched. i have a picture somewhere of he and i parked next to each other laughing about it.
171 no_pizza_4_u Had a similar thing happen to me. Pulled into a spot, turned off ignition, and double checked my shopping list. All of the sudden I hear someone jerking on my door. I look over and some lady is furiously trying to unlock my van with her key. We made eye contact and her face turned so red. She apologized profusely and then walked to to her almost identitical van one spot over.
409 spectre73 A social studies teacher told a story of how he had to brrow a students car one day. He knew her to be kind of fastidious and a neat freak so it surprised him to find her car had a fair amount of trash in the back seat. He mentioned it jokingly to her when he got back. She was confused as her car was clean, what was he talking about? He pointed to the car he had used. "That's not my car," she replied, and pointed to another absolutely identical car - same make, color and model -"*That's* my car." The teacher had borrowed another students car and her keys had worked.
38 hooblagoo What if you two were parked close enough and you each happened to press "unlock" on your key remotes at the same time (but neither of you noticed) and both cars opened and you both got in and each of you had a similar moment of panic thinking: >did i just enter into an alternate dimension? this is my car but also not my car... wtf wtf wtf wtf oh wait who is that guy looking at me from my car
230 altaltaltpornaccount I had this happen before. Same make, model, color, trim package, with the same dealership decals, only 2 digits of our license plates were different, and we had the same key. We were also regulars at the same bar, and on more than one occasion have driven off in the others car.
29 Merfen This reminds me of when my dad and I were getting back in his car after going to get some food. Someone had an identical car(same model, year and colour) to my dad and parked right next to us. It was right in front of the door so I went to one side of his car and he went to the other side of the other car and we both got in. We looked over, saw each other in a different car and knew one of us fucked up. He quickly got out when he saw his key didn't work, never seen him that embarrassed.