when i went to the pond i saw ducks making tiny waves, so i assumed that waves in the ocean were caused by giant deadly ducks.
That if I ate the black watermelon seeds, a watermelon would grow in my stomach and explode. I distinctly remember my sister and I in the kitchen when she told me this, and I started to cry hysterically
That we’d get pulled over for having the lights on in the car.
I thought you stored poop in you buttcheeks like a squirrel storing nuts in its cheek.
I thought old black and white movies and TV shows were black and white because the Earth was black and white back then.
My dad told me that boxers were just labradors who was punched really hard on the nose as puppies. I felt so bad for our dog.
I believed my Super Nintendo got sad when it lost too many fights against me in Street Fighter II, so sometimes I let it win and tried not to make it too obvious, to let it enjoy its victory and be happy.
When I was a kid i thought if I bath well enough and scrub hard enough I can be white, like white people white.
I think the dumbest thing I believed as a child was that I thought that tiny elves lived in traffic lights and controlled them
That my creepy uncle was only checking me for prostate cancer.
That plain trails were the planes scraping the top of the sky.
Counting. Here’s how it worked for me:
...I’m now majoring in math
Friends said my mom smokes weed. And I asked and she said it was cloves. I took said cloves and brought to friends and laughed and said that’s weed. Then we smoked it.
I couldn’t get my head around the idea of recorded music. I believed that bands went to radio stations, played their songs live and then went to the next radio station to play their song again.
I only understood after my Dad showed me how cassettes worked.
My friend convinced me that gullible wasn't in the dicitionary. I believed him for a very long time, up until some explained exactly what the joke was.
I used to think George HW Bush was a weatherman because he was on TV all the time
One time when my sister was at school my dad told me she was in this hat. I spent all afternoon calling her name into an empty hat and waiting for her to come out.
A cousin (way older) told me that the flying stars are Witches traveling and looking for a kid to eat. So when i see one, i always scream and run for my life.
What a dumb ass cuy
My parents told me that 4th of July fireworks was Star Wars happening and the big finale was the rebels blowing up the Death Star.
Paul McCartney’s ghost lived in my attic.
ETA: I know he’s still alive. It was some heavy duty mind-fuckery.
That all dogs were boys and all cats were girls...