always stab yourself as soon as you enter a car. better to be safe than sorry.
Actually, in my experience, all you have to drop is the word ‘diarrhea’.
‘Officer, I know I was speeding, and I’m ok with the ticket, but can you just follow me home and write me a ticket there? I have diarrhea, and I’m literally going to shit my pants’
He just told me to get the hell out of there.
just stab the cop. At first he will get mad until you say “Knife to meet you”. He’ll let you go without a ticket after having a nice chuckle at your cleverness.
Ok but this COULD work
Claim the stabbing is work related if you need an escort to work instead!
bonus: this also works in the U.S. because emergency room doctors have to treat you even though you don't have insurance.
Just have a good curry and if you get pulled over shit yourself, they wont touch you OR try to help you and cause you to be late.
Sounds like ohpee tried to rip off this: https://imgur.com/B6h4d23
Would telling the cop you’re also HIV positive be crossing the line?